we hope for longer goodbyes

If there's one thing that I'm not really good at [well, aside from Math] it's saying goodbye to those people who have been dear and close to me. This goodbye doesn't mean a simple goodbye. It's the kind of farewell that you say when you go off for a long journey ahead.

The seniors' day started with the processional, which is the ultimate beginning of every graduation rite. We didn't know that the teachers had something for us; and during that event, I already felt that I am already on the verge of crying. I get too emotional whenever these things happen.

And I thought what I felt was simple; and I thought that it would end there. When we were told that they're giving us a day off tomorrow, we were at first happy; but after a few moments, some people cried out that they still want to go to school tomorrow. I'm so tired and sick of all those songs and practises but I still want to go to school tomorrow. As in. I never thought I'd be this nostalgic since in the first place, I am not really that kind of person. Well, my strongface image is just a facade--that's been proven twice this school year. :(

I almost cried when we were in the Pananagutan classroom a while ago. I will forever love IV-Pananagutan. I'll miss my classmates. I love them so much. :) I will miss my seatmates. :) I will forever miss the after-recess aircon. I will miss the weird smell of our classroom. I will miss the Finch Patrol! :) I also almost cried when I jumped off my school bus. I never thought this morning that it would be the last day that I'd be riding that red school bus. Some of my mature busmates greeted me goodbye and good luck in college. I was so moved by that. My school bus manong for four years also greeted me goodbye with his usual happy-lolo face. Awwwww. I really felt weird this day.

This has been my most productive year in high school. I have worked for so many things and learned a lot from them as well. It was full of pain, stress but fun, too! All the things that I have done contributed to my own personal growth and I'm very thankful that I have done all those things.

It's just sad that we will be really going to different places and will be separating. For all those years, tight bonds were already tied along us; and now we'll be going to different places. Some will be in the posh Ateneo, in the abode of the green archers in Taft, in the royal university in Manila, and of course, in the kuta of the aktibistas. :)

This is one of the most surreal experiences that I had. I'm so happy. :)

e7ite is love

holy what?

If there's anything about recollections/retreats that I really like--it's the fact that I can eat my meals at the right time. Very right time. Only that. No more.

This year's last recollection which I believe should be the most renewing, most meaningful, most fruitful and most memorable turned out to be the total opposite of my expectations. First of all, the schedule really sucks. Second, the activities were really uninteresting. Very uninteresting. It will make you hate the facilitators, the fact that you're there, the teacher who're with you who would do nothing but tell that they never expected seniors to be like that, like this, what the hell. It will only make you more sinful. By the way, confessing your sins was not included in the activities. That's also one of the things I want in retreats, actually. So now you know how sucky the whole experience is.

I hated the psychogenetics thing. Yes, we all know that genes are really vital when it comes to your offspring, etc. but I don't think it's right to make it a basis in knowing how your married life would be in the future. They said there's a pattern. For instance, my maternal grandparents were separated and my mom and her siblings lived separately with their different extended families; according to psychogenetics, it is also most likely to happen to us. Meaning, my family would also get miserable like my mom's. Thank you for telling us that; also, thank you for insisting that it's accurate. We really appreciate it. I have been taught by the Roman Catholic belief that the relationship among family members would always depend on the way the members of the family interact and communicate with each other and of course, in what they call God's grace. If Psychogenetics is true, then it means God seems to put a curse on the generations whose senior members of the family are separated.

Catholicism never became unconfusing. This is why I am not faithful at all.

Prosec field trip is tomorrow. I am not ecstatic about it. I never enjoyed Prosec. I don't even think that we're actually getting the worth we're paying. All we do in Prosec is spend, and experience the stress of raiding your closet and unearthing something that you think would look good in you. Prosec field trip my ___.

I'll tell you something. The facilitating priest in our recollection is gay. And what makes it more obvious to me is his effort to hide his sexuality. What now if you're gay? You'd not be sinful unless you bang someone from Adam's children. Hahahaha. I'm so bad for saying this; I know, don't you worry. I never pretended to be a good school-girl. Plus, he never stood up from his chair. Buti sana if the chair was placed on the center of the conference hall eh, pero no, it's placed on the corner. And the voice, nako;

Before I end this, I tell you dear batchmates who are reading this. Rejoice! Because the food in Arnold Janssen Spirituality Center had undergone a major improvement. As in.

My blog sucks when viewed using an Apple iBook. I hope I know how to get things fixed up but no, I don't know how. Kaila, you there? Haha. :)

Bound to be there

There's no turning back. I'm entering UST for college. The course? Guess what: BS NURSING. I don't know what was I thinking when I wrote BS Nursing in my 1st choice course in my UST application. And I actually feel dismayed that I'm only waitlisted in my 2nd choice course: BS MEDTECH. That's the course I really want to get in! I should have put it in my first choice and maybe I'd get accepted there, not only waitlisted. Hay nako. Ang weird. I'm sure there are more people vying for a slot in BS Nursing than in Medtech, and why did I not get in? Waitlisted pa eh noh, UST na nga lang eh. Ang bobo, nakakaawa.

Person 1: don't feel bad, okay lang yan kahit Nursing ka kasi UST naman eh. hindi naman FEU, Fatima at kung saan saan dyan.
Person 2: ano ka ba. may standards ang UST nursing. bawal ang panget at pandak dun. [hanep, nanglait pa siya noh]
Person 3: alam mo ba sa UP Manila, bulok dun. [oo nga, naisip ko rin. pero UP pa rin yun!]

I'm actually okay with Nursing since I'm not taking it for my future career--I'm taking it as my pre-med course. Well aside from Medtech, it's the most ideal pre-med course since the lessons are very very close. The only reason why I don't like it is because people stereotyped Nursing students as students na ang tingin sa Nursing ay isang malaking hanapbuhay na maghahatid ng instant yaman. Wow, parang gusto ko na talaga mag-nurse sa abroad para naman yumaman ako agad. WAHAHAHAHA. JOKE LANG. DI KO GAGAWIN YUN. Okay, Clarissa, sinasabi mo lang 'yan kasi ayaw mong madismaya kasi mukhang sa UST ka na talaga. Wag ka na.

Okay, enough. Let's just see what will happen with my UP reconsideration then I'll choose which is better.

Peace SHoutS was actually quite uneventful and very very very boring. I enjoyed the Chubibo though. First time kong sumakay ng ride na mukhang tataob sa oras na humampas ang malakas na hangin. Every time we'd see rides like the Chubibo, my parents would always tell me not to ride rides of such kind because it's very dangerous. Well, I'm big now. I rode the chubibo 3 times! Haha. My last ride, enjoy talaga! Don't ask why. Haha. :)

The Baila was nice. But I think there are already too many members. I'm not impressed to the Aglaia and Pep now as I was impressed to them before. One thing, they seem to be very plenty in the group [Aglaia and Pep]. Second thing, it's like they accepted everyone else who auditioned. Baka ako kung nag-audition sa Aglaia pasok din. Haha. LOKO LANG. Baka may isang taong baduy dyan na seryosohin 'to tas lumikha ng issue. Haha.

The Bandaid was too expensive! Freefall lang na-enjoy ko eh. Sana sinama na rin nila pati Dalandan Soda para mas masaya talaga eh. I thought it would be actually nice since the theme for this year is Retro music. Aba, I was so wrong. There were bands na sobrang binaboy 'yung kanta ng Beatles. What happened to Strawberry Fields Forever when the 2nd to the last band played it? Jusko. Please lang, wag niyo nang ulitin. If I were one of the judges, I'd go for my batchmates' band, 93 Kilometers since sila lang 'yung hindi nambaboy sa mga kanta. Haha. Yes, I'm so biased.

One thing I hated in this fair the most: the freedom wall. Someone posted this:

Ate Clarissa, hi po! Ang galing mo, crush kita!

Great. Ang galing mo, hate kita! If you're thinking, "Ang feeling naman nito, akala naman niya siya lang ang Clarissa sa school." Haha. I wish it was not really me but someone told me. If you're reading this, I want to tell you this: may sayad ka ba? Haha. :) Pakilala ka naman. WAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

No classes tomorrow! Yehey! I have to start working for English week because I don't love the idea of getting eliminated first in the Oral Spelling Bee. Yeah, how up-to-earth 'no? Haha. :)

I'm thinking of entering Center for Pop Music again this summer. Swear, I'll take it seriously na.

Happiest Holiday!

I always cry over the most stupid things--and it just happened today when Zephyr, the team before us started to make their 'moves'. I was so pessimistic that I thought our cheering kids won't make it good since they sucked on our last runs yesterday. Thank you very much to Sophie and oh-kay, Raissa for boosting my ego that time. I can't believe I cried. Shit. Bullcrap. It was so not me. So not me.

It really feels great when victory finally comes into your hands after working so hard for it. And it actually feels greater when you win by simply doing your best and not expect winning.

It all paid off, it all pid off! I may have been the most terrifying and the most irritating cheerleader this intrams 2006 and I'm really sorry to those who I may have offended in one way or another. Come to think of it, all the pagtataray and pagsusungit worked, right? Haha. :) I do that without even trying, actually. That's my nature. Thanks, Aeris for dealing with me. :) I so love you all, you know. :)

I will always remember this. This will be forever a highlight of my high school life--eew, this sounds so cheesy and schmaltzy. My last intramurals was definitely super great and memorable; super special as well. :)

I'm so happy! :) All the hardwork paid off. Everyone else in the student body loved it. Come on, you know we astound you. :) The shrieking crowd cannot lie. Haha.

I'll surely miss the practises. I'll miss the nights when Nicki and I were conversing through YM and we're talking about nothing but all the 'gimmicks' for the whole routine. I'll miss being threatened by the other teams. I'll miss shouting loud and low under the beating sun. I'll miss being a trying-hard OC when it comes to the synchronization and sharpness of the actions. I WILL MISS THE AERIS CHEERING TEAM!

Oh victory is just so sweet. Victory is absolute bliss! We're all excessively happy to the extent that we were all jumping and jumping high on the stage when we were called for the awarding. I was so full of zest that I cannot stop shrieking to the highest level because of that overwhelming feeling of being victor. OH, I SO LOVE THE AERIS CHEERING TEAM. YOU JUST MADE MY LAST INTRAMURALS SO SO GREAT!

Thank you to everyone. Thank you to Oma the drummer, Anne the one and only efficient props--uhh woman? Haha. Thank you very much, Mrs Valence Torralba. Thank you Kyra Ang for our whoa-ing actions. Thank you to the intrams 2006's best cheerleader Nicki, Juvan, Chia, Irenne, and Mikee :) AND THANK YOU TO THE AERIS CHEERING KIDS! :D I love you all very very much. :)

Ohhhh, extreme happiness is just so overwhelming. So surreal but definitely great! :)

For the last time,

We've got the pride
We've got the spirit
So whoo let's hear it!
So whoo let's hear it!
Come on crowd
Let's shout, let's cheer
For victory is near
We'll rock the court
We'll go fly high
Aeris, electrify
Aeris, ELECTRIFY!

EDIT: Let me say it again--WINNING IS GREATEST WHEN YOU SIMPLY DO YOUR BEST AND NOT EXPECT IT [WINNING]. GO, GO AERIS!

P.S. to all my beloved cheerers na nagta-tag sa tagboard o may balak mag tag, PUT YOUR NAME! haha. magpakilala kayo. don't be shy. :) I know you all kahit 'di halata. haha. :) Thanks!