Chicken Barbeque, I really lurrrve you.

Finally, I'm back from the ugly campsite; the camping was altogether fun, though.

I loved everything that happened last night, especially the chicken barbeque (courtesy of the Culinary Arts Club president, of course). My patrolmates and I really had a hard time building the fire. And I shamefully admit, I had a loooong curse-run from yesterday up to this morning. Yeah. That's all because of fire building, forcing us to move the tent instead of letting the other patrols move theirs, insensitive classmates and patrolmates, and unproductive patrolmates. I have been extremely profane; saying p.i, leche, punyeta, shit, fcuk, damn. What's worse is when I say it, it always follows with a pronoun: you, niya, ka, siya. Grrr. Sorry, sorry. I can't help it when things are really out of my way. You can't blame me. If you were in my situation too, you'd see why I acted that way.

I hated the weather last night and this morning's. It was freaking cold to the point that my muscles were on tension, hard, cold, and hard to move. I woke up in the very very cold morning air, with two layers of thick blankets on me, a jogging pants on and a jacket worn. I was sufficiently covered by clothes but it was really really cold that I refused to go out early to take a bath. Haha. Yeah, yikes.

In times like this, you'd really see the true colors behind a person's character. Some are really just irritating, beyond annoying and insensitive. Most of them are really insensitive; thinking of their own joy and satisfaction, their big tummy's satisfaction! Fcuk damn it. Some even act pretentious to cover up their mistakes and flaws. Come on children, why does it have to take more than sixteen years for you to grow up?!

My body really aches now; especially my knees, legs and feet. Intrams practice from this coming Monday up to December 15 :) Oh by the way, I already saw my grades and I was greatly relieved with Physics. It wasn't that bad. This quarter, I really have to work hard in able to make the status quo in Physics and Math better. I'm happy with English. It was more than what I expected :) I really can't believe it; to think that my test results were not at all satisfactory (to me). What's wrong with Teenstar? For what reason is it that I had a 3-point grade decrease? As for Analytic Geometry, Computer, and Accounting, I think masyadong tinipid ang grade increase na binigay nila, especially in ACCOUNTING and COMPUTER. Uuh, actually lahat sila. Hay nako, kailangan na talagang magsunog ng kilay dahil 3rd quarter na. Kailangan ma-achieve ko 'yung goal ko for graduation. Kailangan.

P.S WANTED: HIGH SCHOOL FEMALE DRUMMER

where's this leading?

I've noticed that I've been doing the most work this school year. I already feel tired with all the school crap being thrown to us, seniors. Extra curricular work also makes me tired, mind you. There's another thing I've realized: I'm leading almost every group that I'm in to in school. There's the club. I thought my responsibility would be easy since it's no performing arts club but what the hey, it's also time-consuming! I have to collect the members' contact details, check to be updated and remind them of things that they should have known. Just for instance, reminding them every week to bring their apron, hairnet and handtowel. Sometimes I just want to stop but I can't. There's this one instance wherein I got blamed (not really directly) becuase their group brought all the ingredients when there's no cooking session to happen. The group acted as if I was to be blamed because I didn't remind them; well in fact, it's THEIR LEADER to be blamed because she's not aware and she does not check up her communication tools. Analyze the situation and you'll see that it's not my fault, but still, I GOT BLAMED INDIRECTLY. (indirectly but it still hurts, you know.) Fcuksmudge. Another thing that I'm on the lead is this cheering event for Intrams; with Nicki, of course. This is an event I can call 'one-time-big-time' and I don't want the team to look crap on the day itself that's why I'm really working on it, making them feel scared whenever I talk to the kiddos so that they're gonna obey me. BWAHAHAHAHAHA. I'm an authority freak. Call it. Haha. :D Thank God and I'm not the patrol leader; because if I am, I'm sure my patrolmates would be blaming me if we don't do well in a given task. That's what I do right now. Haha. Hey, come to think of it, dear patrolmate, it's also her fault. She's too loose and relaxed. Who becomes vexed afterwards? Not her. Us--or me. Haha. Stop this. Arrrgh! There's this English reporting for Iliad that I have to get fixed up. I don't want a mess, of course. Reporting for Mrs Benitez is no joke. Having her unsatisfied with the report would be somewhat a shame. So we've got to prepare for it. :) Hay, JTM sessions pa pala. Sheesh.

Here: club+intrams+english+investi pa pala! GRRRRRRRRRRR.

Oh yeah. There are potatoes waiting for me to be peeled for tomorrow. Bye-yah. :D

3 years now!

It's my 3rd year in BLOGGER. :) November 13, 2003, I searched for the lyrics of Loving You in the net and I found one published in a Blogger-hosted-page so I made one. I didn't start blogging at that time but I made my Blogger alive when I entered sophomore high, was inspired by Kaila back then. My Blogger account so far is the my longest-running and updated blog. I've had Livejournal, Diaryland, Motime, and Blogdrive before.. haha. Blogger the best pa rin. Although it sucks sometimes. :) I have a Wordpress account, too; and that is for my 'special dramas' :)

Got to get back to work. :)

Tell me what's wrong with me, please.

I usually get pretty good grades without even trying, actually; and I think I'm usually confident and I'm not that type who gets terrified during times like this because Mrs Dino might call my parents home and tell them that I failed this and that. But honestly now, I'm really scared. If you have read this blog from then on, you know that I have not done well in Physics this quarter and that fact scares the hell out of me. Really. I have passed the exam but I'm not really sure that it won't make an immense effect on my grade. The school follows a cumulative grading system which means that 30% of last quarter's grade would be added to 70% of this quarter's grade in order to get the final grade. My Physics grade last quarter was actually pretty good compared to a large fraction of the seniors in my batch but still, I'm not really sure. 11-point grade decreases are always possible and I'd die if that happens to me in this case. I'm not at all relaxed in this point even though I go carefreely in school with all the perks and wackiness I have. Uhh. Blah.

Fairboard Commitee qualifiers were now posted and surprise! I did not get chosen. That's not new. Despite my whoa-ing application-letter-turned-formal-theme, I did not get in because I have not established a good relationship with any of the faculty members. I know that's one point. They may have thought that what I'm saying in my letter was all a prettified word make-up because they don't really know me. There's nothing I can do. The only thing that I noticed was there were more junior qualifiers than seniors. Well then, maybe more juniors applied. T_-. Hah, stop it. For a factual instance, the Bandaid Committee.

Saturday classes are actually altogether useless. Why? Because not everyone attends it. Hello, it's Saturday. It's the seventh day of the week and people are supposed to rest. God rested on the seventh day of creation of the world. That's in the Bible. It's not Sunday because in the calendar, Sunday is the first day of the week and Saturday is the seventh. Check it out if you disbelieve me. You always do anyway.

My feet are aching. I'm dog-tired, and sad, and nervouse. I wanna cut the phone line's cord. Please, don't do this to me. Don't.

I came across this:

Signs and symptoms

Signs and symptoms for each type of leukemia differ, but common symptoms include:

• Fever or chills
• Persistent fatigue, weakness
• Frequent infections
• Loss of appetite or weight
• Swollen lymph nodes, enlarged liver or spleen
• Easy bleeding or bruising
• Shortness of breath when you're physically active, as while climbing steps
• Tiny red marks in your skin (petechiae)
• Excessive sweating, especially at night
• Bone pain or tenderness

I have been always puzzled by Leukemia. I have read and watched a lot of Asian stories wherein the main characted is stricken by the disease. It's very common among Asians. Asians like me. I just wonder. I hope and pray that all I'm thinking would not come true even though I always experience the emphasized symptoms above. Please, no. I always experience the bone pain thing and it's really painful. It does not happen everyday though; but it happens most of the time. There's this feeling like your front bone in your right leg is being sliced and being injected with something cold. Seriously, it hurts and when it happens, it stays for 3 minutes or so like that. And I don't why that happens.

Intrams practise is actually fine. Team A Cheering is actually masunurin but some of them are really hard-headed and annoying. There are some who're testing my patience. I'm doing all my best to be nice to them especially yesterday. From our first meeting, people have been telling me that I am being terrifyingly mataray and masungit. I do that without trying. That comes out naturally from me. Ms Malayas was with us the entire day yesterday so I was like holding back everything that I want to say. I was watching my words because she might think maldita pala 'tong si Clarissa, tsk. I hate things like that. I'm not doing that again on our next practises because when I'm loose, they tend not to work hard. Kaya mahina kami kahapon. Bwiset talaga. I'm experimenting which one is effective: the terror (as Raissa puts it) one, or the pa-nice-effect-ate one. I guess I'll stick to the terror one. :)